valleydude
Feb 19th, 2008, 12:41 PM
Anyone see the article in this month's playboy on flirting, attraction, sex, and marriage? For the PUA folks a lot of it will be old news, but there was some good new stuff I had not heard in there, and it was a great review of the overall scientific finds.
The upshot of the article -- Women choose which men they allow to approach them through flirting, and that your odds drop dramatically if they are not signaling.
PUA folks might disagree and say that you can sleep with almost anyone (debatable) , but for any kind of meaningful long-term relationship, you would probably want to be someone they were attracted to.
In a way, this kind of takes the pressure off. Though it's tempting to want to make a person like you, it's just not very doable. Better to keep your senses open for the obvious flirting signs, and then decide if that person is what you want. The best part about that approach is that there is a slim chance that even the ones who weren't into you initially might come around just out of curiosity to why you are not reacting to their charms like every other guy.
The upshot of the article -- Women choose which men they allow to approach them through flirting, and that your odds drop dramatically if they are not signaling.
PUA folks might disagree and say that you can sleep with almost anyone (debatable) , but for any kind of meaningful long-term relationship, you would probably want to be someone they were attracted to.
In a way, this kind of takes the pressure off. Though it's tempting to want to make a person like you, it's just not very doable. Better to keep your senses open for the obvious flirting signs, and then decide if that person is what you want. The best part about that approach is that there is a slim chance that even the ones who weren't into you initially might come around just out of curiosity to why you are not reacting to their charms like every other guy.