generaltojo
Aug 2nd, 2005, 01:57 PM
Thereís this relatively passable show on reruns on TBS these days called ìBecker (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0174378/),î starring Ted Danson of ìCheers.î Fame. In it, he plays a misanthropic fellow who thinks that the world is a miserable place and pretty much sucks (if that doesnít sound funny, it leads to a bunch of irascible quips and un-PC one-liners that are actually pretty hilarious. Yes, good writing can make any has-been funnier than he actually is.)
In the ep I saw today, a blind dude named Alex, who also happens to be black, meets a knockout of a woman named Nina, who also happens to be blind. Only he doesnít know it until they go out on a date, from which he dumps her because sheís blind. Why? Because heíd always pictured himself going out with someone who sees, as opposed to meeting the stereotype that the handicapped are only fit for the handicapped.
But soon he realizes that sheís a great person and thus the error of his ways, so he meets her again. ìIím glad weíre back together,î he says. ìDumping you because youíre blind is like you dumping me because Iím black.î From which she, of course, dumps him: ìI didnít know. Sorry, I just never pictured myself being with someone whoís black.î
Reggie, the owner of the diner theyíre at was livid, calling Nina a racist. Alex was more philosophical: ìThe heart wants what it wants.î Becker just says this: ìThe world is full of narrow-minded, shallow, superficial people ñ just like Iíve been telling you every day for the last two years.î (All of this, of course, is said within the context of a sitcom, so itís a lot funnier, but the underlying message is pretty sobering.)
Because heís fucking right. Makes me think of how fucked up this world can be when an Asian womanís ìheart wants what it wants,î and itís a White Guy, as opposed to an Asian one. CCBís are all of the above: racists, people who are honest with what they want, and narrow-minded, shallow, superficial. And, based on all these observations, theyíre also terribly normal.
As ridiculous and unjust as it is, THIS ñ IS ñ NORMAL. Get used to it.
Asian men are the blind black men of life. We stumble about with expectations of our own, only to find out that others also have expectations that are clearly not them. Does that negate our expectations? Not necessarily, but we must adjust them to meet the conditions of normalityÖ just like blind people, black people, gay people, handicapped people, or anyone else born or forced a few feet behind the starting blocks in life.
What are our options?
1. Reggie = Rage.
2. Alex = Shrug it off and move on.
3. Becker = Hate the world
All unacceptable. Alternatives?
4. Change the perception of what ìterribly normalî is.
5. Force reality to accept your version of ìnormal.î
Asian guys didnít ask for our lot in life, like many other people. But options 1-3 are unacceptable. We have an obligation to forcibly change the perception of ìterribly normal,î in the tradition of all other great activists in this world ñ Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr. Nope, this is not too lofty company for us. Itís just about right, methinks.
People have amply demonstrated on this board that they do not like it, but fuck them: their ìnormalî is not as moral and good as our ìnormal.î Ours, quite simply, is better. Itís not an easy road, but itís the moral one, the high-ground we can occupy with pride. Just learn to look beyond your nose, the mirror, and the noses of all the other narrow-minded, shallow, superficial people in this world and focus on the big picture.
A good friend of mine once asked me this: ìWhy donít you care about how you yourself feel?î Being angry and miserable (option 3) is doing exactly that. Care about how you feel. Just learn to love yourself, and have pride in being what you are and who you are. And on that near-impregnable basis, we can execute options 4 and 5, and thus make this world a much better place than it is.
In the ep I saw today, a blind dude named Alex, who also happens to be black, meets a knockout of a woman named Nina, who also happens to be blind. Only he doesnít know it until they go out on a date, from which he dumps her because sheís blind. Why? Because heíd always pictured himself going out with someone who sees, as opposed to meeting the stereotype that the handicapped are only fit for the handicapped.
But soon he realizes that sheís a great person and thus the error of his ways, so he meets her again. ìIím glad weíre back together,î he says. ìDumping you because youíre blind is like you dumping me because Iím black.î From which she, of course, dumps him: ìI didnít know. Sorry, I just never pictured myself being with someone whoís black.î
Reggie, the owner of the diner theyíre at was livid, calling Nina a racist. Alex was more philosophical: ìThe heart wants what it wants.î Becker just says this: ìThe world is full of narrow-minded, shallow, superficial people ñ just like Iíve been telling you every day for the last two years.î (All of this, of course, is said within the context of a sitcom, so itís a lot funnier, but the underlying message is pretty sobering.)
Because heís fucking right. Makes me think of how fucked up this world can be when an Asian womanís ìheart wants what it wants,î and itís a White Guy, as opposed to an Asian one. CCBís are all of the above: racists, people who are honest with what they want, and narrow-minded, shallow, superficial. And, based on all these observations, theyíre also terribly normal.
As ridiculous and unjust as it is, THIS ñ IS ñ NORMAL. Get used to it.
Asian men are the blind black men of life. We stumble about with expectations of our own, only to find out that others also have expectations that are clearly not them. Does that negate our expectations? Not necessarily, but we must adjust them to meet the conditions of normalityÖ just like blind people, black people, gay people, handicapped people, or anyone else born or forced a few feet behind the starting blocks in life.
What are our options?
1. Reggie = Rage.
2. Alex = Shrug it off and move on.
3. Becker = Hate the world
All unacceptable. Alternatives?
4. Change the perception of what ìterribly normalî is.
5. Force reality to accept your version of ìnormal.î
Asian guys didnít ask for our lot in life, like many other people. But options 1-3 are unacceptable. We have an obligation to forcibly change the perception of ìterribly normal,î in the tradition of all other great activists in this world ñ Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr. Nope, this is not too lofty company for us. Itís just about right, methinks.
People have amply demonstrated on this board that they do not like it, but fuck them: their ìnormalî is not as moral and good as our ìnormal.î Ours, quite simply, is better. Itís not an easy road, but itís the moral one, the high-ground we can occupy with pride. Just learn to look beyond your nose, the mirror, and the noses of all the other narrow-minded, shallow, superficial people in this world and focus on the big picture.
A good friend of mine once asked me this: ìWhy donít you care about how you yourself feel?î Being angry and miserable (option 3) is doing exactly that. Care about how you feel. Just learn to love yourself, and have pride in being what you are and who you are. And on that near-impregnable basis, we can execute options 4 and 5, and thus make this world a much better place than it is.