The Atheist’s Nightmare: Peanut Butter
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How did I not realize this before? Man, this changes everything. It’s so obvious now. Now I know that it’s impossible for new life to spring up from nowhere, because otherwise our food industry would implode.
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lopan
11:54 am | Mar 29, 2007Silly, silly creationsit fundies.
jaehwan
2:06 pm | Mar 29, 2007I like how they describe him as an “engineer.” All these fundy bible-thumpers like to give themselves all sorts of credentials to make themselves appear legit. The weird thing is that they’re perfectly rational when it comes to things that don’t contradict creationism, but common sense and intellectual honesty go out the window when they address evolution.
Dialectic
2:27 pm | Mar 29, 2007That shit is insane. This is the type of “thinking” they promote in the deep-south? No wonder Bush won a second term!
Vetrean
5:07 pm | Mar 29, 2007Putting aside the rest of the stuff, the old d00d looks kinda cool. I like his voice.
Incidentally, I think it’d be awesome if every now and then, you’d open a peanut butter jar to find an entirely new kind of life inside it.
vsoy
10:29 pm | Mar 29, 2007You mean this wasn’t a parody? I thought this was the funny, cheesy video clip.
kimtae
10:35 pm | Mar 29, 2007That’s funny because in the book of Judges chapter 14 a swarm of bees spontaneously generates along with honey from the body of a lion (no mention of the hand of God). Hmm, honey, that would go really good with the peanut butter that old guy was holding.
Hey! What if the lion had spontaneously generated some Bama PBJ instead of honey? They like that in the South. Bama for those of you who might not know is PB and J already mixed in vertical stripes in the jar. Mmm, that’s the kind of delicious ecumenical quandry I like.
Vetrean
10:55 pm | Mar 29, 2007Uh…how does it spontaneously generate? ‘Some time later, he went back to marry the girl(NIV),’ implying that he had made a return trip, waited a while(likely a week or more) and then went back.
The bees just invaded the carcass and turned it into a hive. ALthough I’ve never heard of bees making a hive in the carcass, that certainly doesn’t sound spontaneous to me.
kimtae
1:32 am | Mar 30, 2007Okay bible boy, you wanna split hairs? Bees just invaded a carcass? Are you really that dumb? Let me school you a little.
According to Webster, spontaneous generation is “the generation of living from nonliving matter…”
What is xtian doctrine if not based entirely on the idea of spontaneous generation? From the idea of a god that exists out of nothingness to an entire ordered universe created spontaneously from that very same god who also goes on to command life from mud to create Ada and Eve, the entire faith supports the idea of something from nothing and a direct contradiction of the second law of thermodynamics and the conservation of matter and energy.
There, good enough for you? Now you and grandpa go have a big ole slice of Wonderbread with some Bama and think it over a spell.
Cattygurl
6:25 am | Mar 30, 2007The thing is, even Xtians are embarassed and trying to cover this up as a “spoof.” One woman said “Chuck Missler is an intelligent man- this is his version of a joke.”
Chuck is a known and loud/proud creationist. Why the fuck would he spoof his own beliefs like this?